I found this in a fortune cookie at an engagement party i recently went to. Gasp! It knows my future!
Everytime I am faced with a problem and start having the ‘why me??’ thoughts, I will always be reminded of what Christina Yang said once in an episode of Grey’s Anatomy.
“Everyone has problems. Deal with it.”
That is, in fact, true. And I will feel slightly better for at least two minutes. It’s better than nothing anyway. I have always been a pretty optimistic person. I don’t believe in wallowing for too long. Time still ticks, and you’re only wasting your own time if you drown yourself in your sorrows. Live still moves on, and (based on my previous entry) it’s all temporary in this lifetime anyway. In case you hadn’t noticed, we’ll all die sooner or later, so you see what I mean by temporary? I also like the positive sayings like ‘every cloud has a silver lining’, ‘everything happens for a greater reason’, you know, all that stuff.
The problem is, those sayings only sound pretty when you hear it during your stress-free time. When you’re actually in a predicament, and you’re very upset, all you want to do is round-kick anyone who says those sayings to you.
I am currently going through a rough patch, which is pretty normal for the rest of us, because we’ve all got our own ups and downs. Work, which is one of the things I rely heavily on to make my life more meaningful, is screwing me. My social life isn’t really prospering well either. I am pretty sure that one day I will look back at this and laugh, but for now, I am not exactly feeling jolly or upbeat about it. Right now I am thinking, ‘Why me? Why does it seem like everything awful is happening to me? And all at once, too.’ I have good friends who will hear me vent all day if I need to, but really what’s the point in that? I am responsible for my own problems. That being said, I am also responsible for my own happiness.
I’ve realized that all of my downsides at the moment – work, life – are only occurring because I depend on other people for my own well-being. I depend on people at work to make me feel like I am doing something worthwhile. I depend on people in my social circle to make me feel like I am living a contempt life. You see, that’s the problem when you rely on people. You end up, for the most part, disappointed. This is because you fantasize that people will rescue you. When really, the truth is, people are just like you. They have limitations and boundaries. If you must rely on something, let it be two things and not more – God, and yourself. God, because let’s face it, without a belief system I would’ve probably jumped off a bridge many years ago. Yourself, because at certain points of your life, you’re the only one you can count on. Of course you’ll have your family, spouses, friends who will probably take a bullet for you (like the ones we see in TV dramas), but the thing to remember is that you are, first, foremost and most importantly, responsible for your own happiness. Everybody else is just joining in the celebration.
Well, this sucks. I thought I’d feel better after writing this entry, but I sort of don’t. Haha.