Cards I've kept, some dating as far back as the late 90s.
One day, my Mother asked me to clear up some space in my bedroom. I am a hoarder. I keep everything from old school books to empty perfume bottles, weird teenage-phase accessories (like a belly button ring. Why the hell did I have a belly button ring?) to worn out posters of Justin Timberlake. I came across a bag filled with greeting cards.
There were not only greeting cards. There were love letters, small notes scribbled on a piece of torn paper, postcards from friends and even apology notes from girlfriends. I sat on the floor of my room and read through them one by one. Some are hilarious, some are so grammatically incoherent I had no idea what they were saying, and some are downright touching that I immediately remembered exactly how I felt at that moment when I got these notes and writings.
As I went through them each I realized that there are three groups of people who wrote all these – people that have remained in my life up to this day, people I used to be close to but not anymore, and people whom I no longer talk to at all and have no idea what happened to them.
Why do we meet certain people in our lives? I have long ago succumbed to the fact that there is absolutely no such thing as a coincidence. That being said, there is absolutely no such thing as meeting someone by coincidence. It’s all part of the plan, how you fall into a situation where you’ll end up meeting somebody, whether it is a friend at a gathering, an acquaintance introduced by someone else, or a stranger in the bus who you’ll probably never see again, ever. Everyone you meet in this life, you meet for a reason.
Sometimes this leaves me baffled. Why do I always end up sitting next to a weirdo in the plane? Why do I meet friends who drift away eventually? Why do I meet guys who would proceed to hurt me? I spent a lot of time analyzing this as I grew up.
As I made my peace with the fact that no meeting is a chance meeting, I realized that people exists in your life to teach you things you cannot teach yourself. It is part of the Big Plan that you would meet these people, so that you can take away something that you’ve learned about your relationships with them. It doesn’t have to be a prominent lesson or anything, but these are the small things that would eventually build you up to become who you are right now.
The more I settled with this idealism, the happier I became. A friend who turned up to be unreliable? Well at least I now know that relying too much on other people is stupid. An annoying guy you sat next to all through your flight who kept talking about Canada? Well now I know one about one other place in the world. A guy who broke your heart? Well thanks to him I now know a few different bands with great music from his iPod selection.
Knowing many people throughout our lives is a great way to upgrade ourselves. After so many of it we would eventually understand what is and isn’t acceptable in a relationship with other friends. We would understand what really matters when it comes to meeting a guy. We would learn how to be pleasant to everyone, even strangers. We would see that being constantly angry does no good to anyone. One could only hope, that as we grow older, all these ‘upgrading’ processes will eventually leave us with only great, happy relationships with people that matter, in this world that doesn’t.