The Clam Condition
By Amal Ghazali It’s funny how something could start off so wonderfully, and within an instant it could immediately turn around into a full blown nightmare. This was exactly my thought as I hauled my heavy backpack in the freezing night in Kyoto, trying to not miss my flight to Manila while also struggling to refrain myself from throwing up for the nth time that day. It was my last day in Japan after what seemed like an amazing travel for a couple of weeks, and as luck would have it, I had managed to get food poisoning as the grand finale. I could still recall the night before. My friends and I were exhausted from a day of hiking, and on our last night in Kyoto we wanted to have a quick fix, cheap sushi dinner (this was the last day after all, and we were short of cash). A quick Google research pointed out a nearby place with a good price range, and soon we found ourselves enjoying generic, amazing sushi on an upstairs floor of the building. For good measure, I decided to order a clam miso soup, and remarked that my friends were not as adventurous, as I complimented how delicious the soup was. Clams and I have a pretty dark history. I absolutely adore seafood, but there were times where I would experience the rare occasion of indigestion due to their consumption, specifically speaking the shellfish kind. But of course I was not reminded of this as I slurped away that night, thinking that this was Japan, after all, where food is superior and there couldn’t be anything possibly wrong with indulging in some clammy goodness. I woke up the next morning hurling in the toilet, and the rest of the day was just a blur of projectile vomit, headaches and heady waves of nausea. To make matters worse, I had no choice but to be functional that day, as we had to take the train back to Osaka and board a flight to Manila, my last leg of this particular travel adventure. Getting Sick While Traveling If you travel often, it’s probably only a matter of time before you experience at least an episode of getting sick abroad. It’s all the case of probability, folks. Feeling unwell is bad enough at home, but imagine nursing a fever, coping with diarrhoea or being down with flu while you need to be constantly moving and are far away from the familiar comforts of your bed, food or even weather. It’s not an ideal situation, but these things really do happen more often than we think. With that in mind, here are some tips that I’ve learned along the way that may help you manage the situation if it should ever occur to you in the future. First of all, preparation is key. Regardless of the kind of health state you are in, no one is completely exempted from suddenly catching something – virus, bacteria or even just the change of weather. That being said, pack with you the essentials for the ‘common’ travel illnesses, such as the medications for colds, headaches and digestion issues. Even if I’m backpacking with limited luggage space, I consider these remedies as necessary and I don’t travel without them. Furthermore, I have found that in some countries these basic medications can be expensive, or worse, not exactly compatible with your body (some painkillers can irritate your stomach if you’re not used to them, for example). The next important point to remember is that prevention is always better than cure. In my case, I should’ve probably reminded myself that although I was feeling adventurous, my digestion system might not share a mutual sentiment. Research is helpful, and reviewing restaurants in new places will identify possible risks you might not know of. If you know yourself to be allergic or sensitive to certain things, consuming them while traveling is perhaps a bad idea. The same could be said of other circumstances as well, such as not staying out too late if your body is not used to it back home, or reducing the exposure to certain weather conditions (rain, too much sun etc.) if you are prone to get ill from these situations. And of course, if by some unfortunate chance you still get sick, there is no other choice but to plough through them. If it’s serious then of course you’d have to seek proper medical assistance, but if it’s the common illness that is personally bearable or manageable, take these few recommended steps to reduce the torture and promote faster recovery. Drink lots of water, and although this is pretty much common sense, most of us tend to forget this especially while traveling. Stick to only ‘safe’ foods, and this means neutral, non-irritating menus. Food that are too spicy or raw may encourage the situation, for example. Even consider taking the day off from visiting public places or being too adventurous – perhaps your body could benefit from the extra rest and chill at the hotel for the day. This is especially true if you’ve been out and about for days on end, and your body is lacking the proper rest it needs. Unfortunate Episodes Do Happen The bad news is, travel, like life, doesn’t always go as perfectly as we’d plan. Sickness isn’t exactly considerate of our vacation dreams, and as much as we hope it doesn’t happen, it still does, sometimes in the worst of places. I had a friend who caught a bad case of scabies while on a month-long Trans-Siberian train adventure, and she described it as an itchy nightmare while being confined in a train’s coach for days. Just when you thought that traveling can be as picture perfect as the documentaries you see on the Discovery Channel. But hopefully the next time you go for an adventure across the globe you’d be better prepared for any health possibilities. Then maybe you’d be able to avoid another episode of barfing your guts out around the beautiful city of Kyoto like I did. The Year Of Gratitude
By Amal Ghazali With the emergence of the New Year, I found myself once again packing my bags for yet another adventure. This time, it was West Sumatera, Indonesia, for about a week. It was a rather immediate decision, but I’ve come to learn that the best things in life always seem to unravel during moments of unplanned, random occurrences. It would almost appear that being there was the perfect breath of fresh air to commemorate the appearance of yet another year. A creature of habit, I always seem to make it a point to make an official list of what I would like to achieve, and plan my whole year around them. A lot of people seem to think that making new year resolutions is such a cliché, but for me it’s a way to form solid aims and goals, or otherwise I would feel like I’m just drifting about while another year passes me by. West Sumatera is a beautiful place. I spent most of my time around Padang, and there were times when I found myself in small, off-the-grid towns. The kind of low key places you wouldn’t find much information about on Google, with no ‘real’ tourist attractions and hardly any Westerner in sight. Unlike the more popular areas of Indonesia, the small towns were modest, with people living simple lives based on mainly agriculture or farming. No fancy restaurants, no five-star hotels, and not even Grab service in some places. But let me be the first to tell you about how nice the people are. The locals are even nicer than your usual Asian-nice. The hospitality is great, crime rates are low, and people are so kind and helpful to the point where you begin to wonder if there is a CCTV planted somewhere by the government to monitor everyone’s behaviour. Despite the fact that these people work hard and have a generally tougher life than we do back home, it is easy to tell that they have a higher score of contentment in their day-to-day lives. First World Problems If you’ve been meddling with the Internet long enough, you’ll notice that there is a coined term called ‘first world problems’. What this generally mean is the need to assess trivial problems in a manner as though they are life-shattering, when they are not. This is absolutely common, especially among my generation within a privileged lifestyle. Some examples include but may not be restricted to; complaining about low internet speed, whining about being bored with an everyday job that pays well, or taking the comforts of a financially stable life for granted. Admittedly, I am certainly one of those people who often ponder on these ‘first world problems’. Sometimes, I would come across an unfortunate event, and I would hone in into this specific problem, with little regard to everything else in my life that’s going well. I think about how my house isn’t that nice as the ones I see in interior magazines, when in fact I am so lucky to even have one. I am quick to feel bored with my corporate work, meanwhile forgetting that some people are struggling to make ends meet with minimum wage or hard labour. My real low point once came when I was having a terrible day and found myself thinking, “nothing right ever happens to me!” How dare I? There I was, in nice clothes, driving my own car, back from a job that has allowed me to travel and live comfortably, while talking to my parents who have always been there for me, and I had seem to not notice any of these great things in my life. I was a prime example of someone with a lot of privileges and very little gratitude. Act On That Gratitude It’s easy to say that you’re thankful for the life you’ve had. But it’s not enough to just say you’re grateful. Anyone could do that. To really cultivate the appreciation, action is required. And no other action shows it better than doing something for the benefit of other people. Selflessness is epitome act of gratitude over the blessings you have. I am not saying we should all start joining a hunger-relief missionary or sign up for UNICEF. But maybe, with the start of the New Year, I could begin with the little things by investing my time for other people, spending more time with family, helping out friends more often, or the occasional local volunteering work. Even charity, as little as giving out a couple of ringgit to the less fortunate, is a great little reminder of how much we have. The comparable value, for example, of how little 5 ringgit means to us versus how significant it is to someone else, is a great opportunity for self-reflection and humility. And perhaps, with better humility and bigger gratitude, we could all experience yet another year with an improved perspective, and eventually, a more contented life altogether. Get Up And Dance
By Amal Ghazali There was a moment this year. It was a Sunday morning. I had woken up early, and in the morning light I put on my boots and went outside the cottage rental I was staying at, plucked a lemon from its tree and made some hot lemon tea. They say Amalfi lemons are some of the best in the world, and I agree. After that I went to sit at the writing desk by the window that faced the vast, open sea. I sat there and wrote for hours, with the gentle breeze coming through the curtains smelling of the sea, my Italian chocolate handy by the laptop with my hot lemon tea. Down the road, I could see the local farmers working in their olive farm, with rows upon rows of beautiful olive trees growing on the long, beautiful Italian coastline. The moment came after a few hours of writing. I stopped looking at my laptop, and stared outside at the beautiful view. I was somewhere in Salerno, but I couldn’t even tell you where I was exactly even if I wanted to. There was nothing there except for my cottage, a few other houses, a very angry dog tied to the tree at the edge of the road, a small grocery store, a café with exactly 2 tables and a bus that came by every hour. I was sitting there writing my second book. I realised that because of certain choices I have made in my life, there I was, in a wonderful Italian village doing what I love best. That was very early in 2018. In the beginning of this year I made a plan to have minimal plans. I remember writing about it in NST in January. 2017 had been a little overwhelming for plenty of reasons, and so I thought that as an experiment, why not try to live through 2018 as spontaneously as possible? What happens if all I do is focus on reconnecting with myself, stop wallowing about the past, pause worrying about the future, throw caution to the wind and live everyday of the year doing whatever I feel like doing? Would days seem any different? Would I enhance the quality of my life? Analysing The Experiment The result? I took time off work to travel solo, meet up with friends, and write as much as I’d like in beautiful places. I found myself on a random skiing trip to a place I’ve never even heard of in Prapoutel, France. I had the best sushi of my life in Tokyo with a Japanese dude I have never even met before. I went to see Vikos Gorge in Greece, the second-deepest canyon in the world I had never even knew existed. I ate half my body weight in Italy. I climbed the highest I had ever been; The Ananpurna Base Camp. I was stuck at a lonely café during a rainstorm in Barcelona. I had food poisoning in Santorini and threw up everywhere. Of course I couldn’t always be traveling. Unlike the characters in Crazy Rich Asians, I have bills and mortgages to pay, an employer with expectations, and a family I’m very close to. But even on the weeks where I was at home, I stayed true to my commitment of trying to live a full, spontaneous lifestyle. In that spirit, I made a choice to finally try out everything I have been meaning to but never got around to because of ‘life reasons’ (and this could include these excuses but not limited to – I’m too busy, I’m too tired to do anything after work, I don’t see the point, I just feel like being lazy and watching Netflix). So I found myself pounding a punching bag in a kickboxing gym almost every Tuesday after work, a place I’ve always been too intimidated to go. It turns out that not everyone there was a professional fighter after all. I practiced playing the Ukulele every week even though I still sound like an American Idol reject to this day. But it’s so much fun to sing along to, so who cares? I squeezed in 2 hours of French classes every week and can now understand simple directions and expressions, something I never thought I could do. I tried roller blading that ended up to be rather disastrous, but hey, at least I tried. I made conscious efforts to spend more quality time with my family, which allowed me to be more present in my nieces and nephew’s lives, even though they live far away. Concluding The Results I’m careful about the advice I take on life. But one of the people I have always admired the most is Oprah Winfrey, a woman I deem to have led a full life, and her advice have always been gold to me. Through one of my readings this year, I came across a book of hers where she said this; when you get the choice to either sit it out or dance, I hope you dance. And boy did I dance this year. I took that advice personally. And in the end, it really did improve the quality of my life. Instead of waiting for vacations and weekends, every single day counts in giving me pleasure, fulfilment and milestones. Instead of thinking of a million reasons as to why I should do something, I opted to think why not? To a certain extent, I had always seem to shroud myself in the expectations of others on how I should live my life. But the thing is, we are all given different circumstances and different opportunities, so make that choice to stop yearning for what others have, and begin living your own truth. And that’s the biggest lesson I’ve learned this year. Don’t just sit it out. Get up there and dance. That’s when the magic happens. A State Of Affair
By Amal Ghazali Have you seen the film Closer? It’s a film starring Natalie Portman and Julia Roberts, which is basically good enough reason to watch something. I was doing some research for a book and came across this 2014 production. In short, it’s a film about four people having affairs, and how it impacted their lives and the lives of their spouses. I’m not even sure if I would recommend seeing this movie. It was beautifully crafted, but painful to watch. After I was done I had to eat 2 bowls of ice cream just to pick myself up again. A movie about infidelity wouldn’t have really fazed me a few years ago, but these days the subject seem to be hovering closer within my radar. Just recently there was a friend who was cheated on by his spouse. It ended their marriage and caused a lot of pain for them and their respective families. And if you’re over the age of 25, I am sure you would’ve at least heard about someone you know in real life who are involved with or have been affected by infidelity. On one of those days when I found myself engrossed in a conversation with my usual group of girlfriends about cheating husbands, unfaithful wives and all the phone apps that you can download to discreetly monitor where and what your spouse is doing (yes, these apps exist! I was as surprised as you are), I found all these so overwhelming that I watched all 3 Bridget Jones movies just to feel hopeful again. For someone who is yet to step into the world of lifetime partners and marital commitments, it scared the heck out of me. Anyone with half a brain knows that cheating is awful and hurts the ones we love, and yet despite our mostly practical grasp of that understanding, some of us are still unfaithful. The question is, why do we do it? Cheating, Explained There are a lot of reasons as to why. If you read enough books, listen to enough stories, and watch enough movies, you’ll find that the list is endless. We fell out of love with time, and I fell in love with someone else. He stopped paying attention to me. She let herself go. Once, an acquaintance told me that upon confronting her husband about an affair, he admitted that he was doing it out of boredom. Like I said, the list of reasons to justify unfaithfulness is varied and colourful. But to begin with, the definition of cheating itself is subjective. Is exchanging prolonged texts considered cheating? Is emotional dependency on someone else that’s not your spouse considered infidelity? Must it only be physical? To add to the complexity, our lifestyles have changed. Affairs can now be virtual, not only physical. There are about a million different channels on the internet where a person could discreetly carry out shenanigans without suspicion. Facebook. Instagram. Twitter. WeChat. Couchsurfing. Line. The choices are endless. Eventually, we land on the conversation as to why. Why do people cheat? Like other human behaviours, if you dig deep enough you’ll find that there is always a simplified reason as to why people behave the way they do, beyond the reasons they would actually tell you. In a research done by Esther Perel, a renowned psychotherapist specialising in relationships, she found that the reason why someone is unfaithful would almost always boil down to the need to re-invent themselves. As life with a stable spouse expands into the roles of partners and parents, a lot of people begin to feel that their true ‘selves’ are eclipsed by these responsibilities. With time, stable relationships can also fall into a plateau where things are no longer as exciting as they used to be in the beginning of courtship. Having affairs, it seems, is a way for some people to explore these facets of themselves they feel like they have lost. Desire also comes into the picture upon analysing these situations. They are not necessarily the conventional aspects of desire we seem to easily associate with infidelity. Rather, it is more to do with self-entitlement. There is a desire to feel adored the way we used to be adored in the early stages of relationships. There is a desire to gain affection and awe elsewhere when we feel as though we are not getting what we deserve in our current relationships. We live in an age where self-fulfilment is deemed priority, and unfortunately some of us will abuse this philosophy through justifying affairs as a way to find these ‘fulfilments’. Ownership Of Actions It’s interesting to see that root cause of disloyalty is, for the most part, our own internal turmoil. It’s even more interesting to observe that pretty much all destructive behaviours are eventually a resultant of our inability to address our personal struggles in a healthy way, and less about how others treat us. It’s always easy to justify infidelity by finding the blame on how the other one treats us. From an outsider’s point of view, I’ve heard this story plot one too many times. But I’ve always wondered if these situations could have been salvaged should we have taken better ownership of our own reactions. No relationship is perfect, and there will always be a time when we are not necessarily treated the way we expect to be treated by our significant other. There will always be something else that’s more seductive somewhere. There will always be times when the grass seem greener on the other side. But in the end, the determinant of these situations will always be our own selves and our own reactions. And to quote a line from the movie Closer, “there’s a moment. There’s always a moment – I can do this, I can give into this, or I can resist it”. I happen to think that there is so much truth to this, as the choice for anything in this life is always essentially, our own. Here are the articles I wrote for New Straits Times for the month of February, 2018! In conjunction with Valentine’s Day (which I don’t celebrate, but hey, I like that desserts are cheaper this time of year), I wrote about the good men in our lives – Dads, brothers, uncles, spouses, friends, and how much having these amazing guys in our lives are blessings that we sometimes take for granted. You can read the whole article in the link below www.nst.com.my/lifestyle/heal/2018/02/335022/amal-muses-love-letter-righteous-men The second article is all about fooddddddd. Or more specifically, food I devoured in Italy to the point that I thought I was going to turn into a blob of cheese (after eating a lot of those).
You can read it at this link below! https://www.nst.com.my/lifestyle/heal/2018/02/339811/amal-muses-napoli-delights Meat Free Monday
By Amal Ghazali If you don’t live in a cave, you’ll notice that the past two or three years have seen a sudden boost in the health scene. Everyone and anyone is talking about healthier eating options and lifestyle. The other day I was chatting to an office colleague, a thirty-something female who had been eating consistent amount of cheeseburgers and fries for the past X years (with a waistline to match), and she started talking about chia seeds and ‘superfoods’. This was when I realised that the movement of healthy eating has literally spread itself everywhere. Perhaps it’s just a trend, but perhaps it’s also the awareness that lifestyle-induced diseases are really on the rise. About two years ago my Father, a self-proclaimed house gardener who managed his own fruit orchard, was diagnosed with hypertension and three blocked arteries. Despite his busy and active lifestyle, it turned out that all the unhealthy meals had begun to take their tolls. Simultaneously, all around me it was evident that office-based work and lack of conscious eating were affecting everyone. Some of my friends, who used to be lean and sinewy, are now overweight and lethargic, and I too was gradually shifting towards that direction. Realising this, two years ago I decided to commit to a self-promise that I would become a full vegetarian every Monday, a full day dedicated to eating natural, clean food, for the rest of my life. I signed the imaginary oath and here I am, two years later, still fulfilling that promise at least once a day every week, all year round. “Why on earth would you want to be a goat one day a week?” Asked a perplexed friend. Plant-Based Food And Their Benefits Ironically, the idea of having meat-free Mondays really came to me one day when I was watching TV while eating a pepperoni pizza. Jamie Oliver was enthusiastically explaining how we need to eat five portions of vegetables a day as a dietary need. Over my half-chewed pizza, I realised that I had only eaten a few slices of cucumber (from a plate of nasi lemak) for the past three days of my required vegetable supplement. I began to think about the reasons of why I had subconsciously failed to consume the ideal dietary portion of meals. One, I did not consciously make an effort to prioritise vegetables. I ate whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted to, without really considering nutrition in the whole equation. Two, vegetables are boring. An image of a vegetable dish will either be a bland salad or even worse, overpriced soups that will make you hungry again in exactly two hours. However, committing myself to a full day of vegetarianism seems to fix a lot of these issues. For one, I am coerced to plan my meals for that whole day. Planning results in conscious eating, which allows me to really think about what I consume. For instance, there really isn’t a point of a meat-free Monday if you end up eating a pile of French fries. Consciously devoting a whole day to plant-based food also makes the whole thing more exciting – I find myself going through online recipes of a variety of healthy vegetarian options (that’s not salad, thank you very much), and making tasty packed lunches which, let’s be honest, makes it easier on the wallet. Much to my perplexed friend’s amazement, I did not at all have to be a goat one day a week, munching on nothing but raw leaves and green juices all day long. Tips To Kickstart Your Meat-Free Day It has been two years and I have absolutely no regrets about having Meat-Free Mondays. It’s hard to begin, but once you have the momentum you’ll find that it’s rather effortless to maintain. To start, entice yourself by doing a bit of research. You’ll find so many resources that explain the benefits of going vegetarian, even on how it affects the environment! Delve into so many appetizing recipes online that prove vegetables don’t have to be boring. I’m talking beautiful vegetable curries, tarts, roasts, stir-fries, and yes, even healthy pizzas. They will keep you from missing meat, and more importantly make the whole vegetarian premise more exciting. I started off with recipes from deliciouslyella.com, but there are hundreds more of these online. Secondly, go easy. If there’s an office potluck this Monday, you can always be flexible. Replace the meat-free day on other days, as long as you commit yourself to actually substitute the day. Otherwise, it will be like that time you tell yourself you’ll clean your closet – you postpone it again and again, and eventually it never happens. Lastly, remind yourself constantly why you’re doing it. I want to travel and do all sorts of fun physical activities even when I am fifty, and this keeps me motivated to look after myself better. Some people are more prone to hereditary illnesses (as do I), and this should drive us to keep tabs on our lifestyles as well. Whatever it is, there is something for everyone when we make conscious efforts in eating right, especially in tackling vegetable consumptions which seems to be a challenge to a lot of people. Hopefully through initiatives such as meat-free Mondays, we can all encourage ourselves to be healthier, and hopefully still be able to try skateboarding when we’re fifty. Divorce.
It's real, guys. Read the whole article below. Looking Past The 'Happily Ever After' Dream By Amal Ghazali There are three main things that I realised are real as I approached the age of thirty – permanent eye bags, the fact that nobody really knows exactly how taxes work, and divorce. Yes, divorce is real guys. And it’s not just something you see happening a lot on E! News. It’s one of those occurrences that you don’t think will ever happen to yourself or your loved ones when you were younger, and now you realise it can actually happen to anyone. It was just a usual day at my office when I heard the news that a couple I knew, both of whom were my friends, were filing for divorce after four years of marriage. The idea of divorcing wasn’t exactly a shock to me anymore by then. I am in the stage of my life where most of my friends have been married for a few years, and this means that the honeymoon phase has passed and the whole candied idea of marriage being a field of flowers filled with rainbows and passions askew are now shattered by the truth – that relationships are hard work and is not always easy. The emergence of this truth affected people I knew in many ways. Some grew stronger, while the rest, unfortunately, dissolved into painful separations. Financial hiccups, baby vomit, loss of affection, his-pants-are-always-on-the-floor, a third person – I began to learn that there are so many reasons why marriages end up in flames. But when I heard about this specific couple calling it quits, I was flabbergasted. I travelled with them once and from what I could tell they were fun, kind and happy people. Wasn’t that enough? The Myth And Truth About Divorce This is the part where I first and foremost tell you that my wisdom on marriages is about the size of a green pea. I have never been married and I would not claim to have a first-hand idea of what life is like on that other side. What I can narrate to you is what I have learned from neutral observations, and how my views on it have changed from my early twenties to current time. I came from a relatively stable background and divorce was almost unheard of within my extended family or friends. I learned a lot about them through watching Western TV, where separations always seem to occur on the characters that deserve it. I’m talking abusive husbands, the mafia, people having affairs galore or any other of those extreme reasons. It seemed like a foreign concept, a different world if you will, that I couldn’t relate to at all. My naivety at the time also assured me that divorce would only happen to bad people. Normal, regular people like us? We’ll find someone, fall in love and be happy forever. Right? Feeling distressed about the news I’ve just heard, I talked to a colleague to try and resolve my confusion over it all. I mean, if even good people don’t stand a chance, aren’t we all doomed? As a girl yet to step into the world of marital union, all of these news of people getting divorced or even people complaining that they are in unhappy relationships spooked me. I want the chase-you-at-the-airport happiness I see in movies! I don’t want to hear stories about you leaving your wife for a younger model because she ‘let herself go’, sir. As we discussed it through, my married colleague and I concluded that marriage, like a lot of other things in life, doesn’t always surpass our expectations on how we want them to be, especially if these expectations were designed by our younger, less-wise selves. Some people work so hard to keep their marriage together but to no avail. Some people had known each other for years before tying the knot, but only lasted a while in the union. Some people get married without knowing each other at all, and theirs last a lifetime. Some people fall apart and then fall back together. Be A Positive Drive Like life itself, each relationship is different, and therefore what works and what doesn’t is unique in their own special ways. Unfortunately, as a society I would easily note that we are sometimes harsh and judgemental towards people going through these difficult times. It is true that the breakup of a family isn’t something we should normalise or encourage, but it is also true that some of us prefer the sizzling gossips and surficial judgement rather than lending a helping hand or providing the right support. Like my friends who were going their separate ways, it was easy to establish the difference between the group who was just there to join the back talks and the group who was genuinely concerned about them coping through as peacefully as possible. I suppose that in the end, divorce truly is real and a harsh reality at that. We take risks in life, including risks in loving others, and sometimes despite our hopes they end up in the sad end of the stick. Part of growing up for me is learning that essentially, we all want to be happy, and through the process of discovering new things and making mistakes, some bumps along the road of relationships are bound to happen. However, what we can always do as a community is channel productive support to our loved ones who are going through these painful dissolutions, and abstain from indulging in abrasive judgment and taboo generalisation. Hopefully, we can all make a good difference in each other’s lives and eventually assist in harnessing better, more positive relationships. This week I wrote about my trip to the local animal shelter. And guys, I can't stress this enough - if you're thinking about getting a pet, please adopt instead of buying.
There are so many crazy kinds of cute at the animal shelter, I promise! Furry Therapy By Amal Ghazali I’ve had pets all through my childhood. My Mom loves cats, so we’ve always had cats around the house. There was even a point when we had seven cats at one time, and it started to feel like we were running a cat farming center. Then we had a bird, but my brother, a toddler at the time, took it out of the cage and stepped on it. That was the end of our pet bird era. We also had tortoises, but they needed cleaning too often. We had fish too, but they ended up dying one by one and down the toilet they went. There was a sugar glider that died due to a mystery cause, and when we buried it my brother was so sad he placed a Ben 10 figurine in the grave so that it will never get lonely. And of course, there was also a pet duck that ended up becoming our neighbor’s meal. But that’s a story for another day. Re-Igniting a Lost Love As an adult I have never had pets. I bought a cactus and it died in three days, so suffice to say I have no talent in taking care of another living thing, hence the decision to not have a pet. And if my childhood animal-caring experience had taught me anything, it is that sooner or later they will all die and I will have to go through the anguish of losing something I am emotionally attached to. When animals die it is a strange feeling of sadness. You remember how innocent they are and how joyfully sincere they are in wanting your affection, and so when they are gone it’s another emotional baggage to bear. I didn’t want that anymore. So for the likes of me, people who love animals but for some reason are not able to care for them at home, there are other alternatives to obtain this therapy. If you’re an animal lover you’ll probably understand what I’m talking about. After all, research had shown that people who bond with animals are a lot less stressful and lead healthier lives. Although it’s great to vent to another human being about bad traffic or a colleague at the office who is being a witch, there is great comfort in indulging in some time with a pet whose life concepts are a lot simpler – eating, playing, napping or cuddling. So after doing some background research, my friends and I decided to pay a visit to an animal shelter nearby. I have actually never been to one before, and in my mind I had painted a picture of what it might look like; a dark dungeon with a permanent smell of poop, with floor-to-ceiling metal cages filled with cats and dogs with dull fur and rabies. In fact, it was quite the contrary. I dare to go on and say that the place looks like it was fit to be an animal sanctuary for suicidal people. First of all, it was such a happy place. The area was large an open, the staff were warm and friendly and obviously loved all the animals they were caring for. All the cats and dogs were well-fed, clean and well-behaved, and there were trees, grass and murals on the walls. I was also surprised to see so many volunteers. There were people volunteering to play with the cats and take the dogs out for walks. One of the staff at the place, Ariff, also told me that all the animals were trained, vaccinated and neutered. The whole place was far from the abandoned nightmare I had in my mind. Selfless Love Is The Best Therapy During my visit we met a family who was there to adopt two cats. I was informed that the shelter sees up to twelve dog adoptions and twenty cat adoptions each month, which is a pretty good rate. It seems that there are a lot of people out there willing to share a home with these lovable, furry creatures. Sometimes, what your mind needs is a break from constantly calculating what your end of a bargain is. That is to say that sometimes, giving love instead of expecting anything in return is the best kind of relief you need. Some people find it through doing charities for the less privileged, and some people find it through connecting with other living things in this world, such as animals. It was a day well-spent at the animal shelter. Although from the outside it seemed like I was doing the animals a favor by investing some time and affection for these homeless strays, but in truth it was the furry friends that made me come home a lot happier and in better spirits after it all. If you’re interested in volunteering or even adopting a pet, visit www.spca.org.my for details. July and August had been rather hectic, but of course that did not stop me from my usual musings in NST! As always, each month I write one column on relationships, and another on health. For August, here's what I wrote about: 1. Relationships - "Thank, But No Thanks" which is a narration on an observation of a fellow male friend making a move on somebody he fancied, and how this is a reflection of pursuing things out of our comfort zones. 2. Health - "In Hot Water" relives an experience to a Hot Water Springs, and the sentiment it has on our society. Here's the link for the second column! https://www.nst.com.my/lifestyle/heal/2017/08/272587/amal-muses-hot-water In case you missed my column from two weeks ago, "Thanks, But No Thanks", you can read it too, at the link below.
https://www.nst.com.my/lifestyle/heal/2017/08/265371/amal-muses-thanks-no-thanks |
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